Friday, April 16, 2010 is a red-letter day. I have a new job, I live in my own condominium, my health is good, and my family loves me. I have so many blessings I can’t list them all.
I have a boy friend, Andy Wilson. He is such a loving person. He makes me happy. I keep a smile on my face when I am
with him. I am falling in love, and I never want it to end. He is a man who has everything. He is wonderful, happy, smart, rich, educated; handsome beyond words, and is still single.
The doorbell is ringing. I slowly cross the floor and open the door. “Come in, Andy”. “Wow, you look absolutely wonderful”. He grabs me, pulls me toward him, and kisses me.
“Dinner will be in about ten minutes, relax for a few minutes.”
“This is wonderful and I don’t want it to end. Would you care to dance?” Andy asks. We dance as my mind keeps telling me; this is too good to be true.
“Paula, I do not feel well. My throat feels a little tight.” “Sit down on the couch. Would you like a glass of water”? His face was beginning to swell, especially around his mouth.
“Andy, I need to call an ambulance for you. You are beginning to scare me”. I called 911, gave them the address and returned to Andy.
His respirations were fast, and he was starting to squeak when he exhaled. “What is happening to you”, I asked. He could not answer me. My mind is screaming, where are they, it is taking too long. I can hear the sirens. “They are almost here, Andy.
Hold on honey, please hold on”.
I followed the ambulance to the hospital. It seemed I waited forever and then the door opened and a nurse in scrubs came to me and asked if I was the person with Andy Wilson. I said, “yes, I am his girlfriend”. She took hold of my hand, and said”, I am so sorry, but we could not save him.” My world went cold and black.
Andy died from anaphylactic shock. It turns out he was highly allergic to peanuts. I kept running our dinner repeatedly through my mind. Where could he have gotten peanuts with our dinner?
I went to the pantry one morning to get my oatmeal. My eyes scanned the shelves; I noticed two bottles of oil sitting next to each other. One was a light corn oil and the other was, the other was, oh my god, its peanut oil. Now I know, I killed my Andy with my good