Strike Three, Your Out

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A Dodger fan waves a rally towel during game 3...

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Jamie Henson, and his girlfriend, Mandy are on their way to a baseball game at Drillers Stadium.  They are both big baseball fans since they both have fathers who played the game.  Both dad’s were in the major league. Jamie’s dad played short stop for the LA Dodgers and Mandy’s dad was a pitcher for the Cubs.  Their shared love of baseball is what drew them together, in the first place.

” I can’t wait to get into the stands and start cheering,” Jamie says.

“Jamie you don’t cheer, you fuss, fume, cuss and stomp, at the umpire. You critique every call that is made, and sometimes very loudly.  As many games as we have been to, you have always done the same thing.  Even at home in front of the TV, you talk or yell at the umpire.”

“I just get excited when something happens.  There is nothing wrong with that.  You are supposed to get excited when the game is going on.  Baseball is a game for the fans, so they can be part of the game.  It is what makes it great.”

They get to Driller Stadium about forty-five minutes before the first pitch.  They find their seats without difficulty.  They are lucky because they have end row seats and a great view of the field.  They settle into their seats as the crowd fills in around them.

Jamie is a large built young man.  He stands about six feet four inches tall and weighs about 250 pounds.  He has really broad shoulders and large biceps from lifting weights.  Mandy is a petite blonde, that will weigh one hundred and ten pounds during her really heavy times.  They are quite a striking pair to look at when they are together.  With his size alone, one can tell he makes a big impression when he gets excited at a game.

The first pitch is thrown and it is a line drive down the third base line.  Jamie is out of his seat yelling, “come on Jones, get those pitches under control.”  He sits back down until another batter hits the ball to the outfield.

The first batter makes a run for home and slides in.  The umpire calls him safe. Jamie is on his feet yelling, “Are you crazy ump?  That guy was out by a mile.  Can’t you see? Do you need new glasses old man?”  Mandy looks at him but does not say a word.  He just smiles and sits back down.

There is an older woman in her seventy’s sitting directly behind Jamie.  She taps Jamie on the shoulder and leans forward as he turns around.  “Young man, would you please stay in your seat so I can see the game?  You are blocking my view and I want to enjoy the game also.”

Jamie says, “sure lady, whatever.”

“Jamie don’t you think you were a little rude to the lady?”

“Mandy, I paid good money to come to this game and I am going to watch it, just like I always do.  She can scoot over a little bit and see just fine.”
Jamie continues his obnoxious behavior and the little old lady asks him again to please sit down.  He just ignores her.

The little lady smiles and says “It’s okay honey, I am going to be just fine.”

Jamie gets two cups containing Coke for himself and Mandy.  He hands Mandy her cup,takes a sip out of his, and places it beside him on the seat.  The batter hits the ball over the back wall, and Jamie stands up, screaming as the runner makes the bases.

The little old lady has her purse in her lap and opens it up.  She takes out a bottle of pills and removes two of them and leans over and places them in Jamie’s coke, without anyone noticing.

After a few minutes Jamie sits back down and picks up his Coke and takes a long drink.  “It is hot out here today, this Coke is really hitting the spot.”  Mandy agrees and goes on watching the game.  She is upset over Jamie’s obnoxious behavior, and is not talking to him very much.

Jamie finishes his Coke, and continues to watch the game.  He begins to feel very sleepy and can’t keep his eyes open.  He tells Mandy he is having trouble staying awake.

“Put your head on my shoulder and close your eyes for a couple of minutes and maybe you will feel better,” Mandy says.  Jamie puts his head on her shoulder and drifts off.

Several plays  happen on the field, and Jamie keeps his head on Mandy’s shoulder.  The little old lady leans towards Mandy and says, “honey don’t worry about him, he is going to be fine.  I just put a couple of my Xanex in his coke to help him calm down.”

Mandy’s mouth fell open and the little old lady sat back and smiled.  She watched the rest of the ball game without any problem.

The moral of this story is, don’t stand when you are supposed to be sitting or it could be strike three, you’re out.

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