Day 13: I read a story this morning from a writer friend of mine Living Words, on FanStory called Ah, For The Dumb Ol’ Days. It struck me as marvelous because he reminded me of how really dumb I use to be, and how much I wish I were that way again. I am sharing the story with you and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
Being a child of the fifties’, I agree with him whole heartedly, about going back to the better times. It is a shame as we age we have to really learn the truth about things that really shouldn’t matter to us. Something changes in us when all of our illusions are taken away. He reminded me what things use to be like when everything I saw seemed so real, and would really like them that way again.
Ah, For The Dumb Ol’ Days By LivingWords
If you saw “Jaws” when it was released to theaters in 1975, you must admit when you visited Universal Studios sometime after, you were surprised…and disappointed. Not only did the shark look like a blue-grey inner tube with plastic dentures, they named him “Bruce” for God sake.
When I first saw “African Queen”, I really believed I was (somehow) witnessing Bogart and Hepburn soaring down the rapids, hanging on for their lives, only to learn later ‘grips’ were tossing pails full of water at them as their “raft” rocked on the equivalent of a mechanical bull. It’s just not the same.
Movies had a greater impact when I was (more) ignorant. I didn’t need to know Vivian Leigh was complaining about Clark Gable’s bad breath during their love scenes in Gone With The Wind. The comedy Pillow Talk, the perfect romantic coupling of Doris Day and Rock Hudson is no longer enjoyable. Jamie Lee Curtis has a penis? Pea soup in the Exorcist? Jello in The Ten Commandments? Chocolate syrup in Psycho? TMI!
TV was better when I was naive as well. “I Love Lucy” is still the greatest, but it was better before I found out Desi was running around on Lucy and their real-life marriage was in the pits. Now the famous line, “Lucy, you got some ‘splainin to do” is more ironic than humorous.
Or that all of Johnny Carson’s wives names started with a ‘J’ because he didn’t want to pop for newly monogrammed towels? Dean Martin rarely drank? That’s not really Donald Trump’s boardroom? My whole world is turned upside down.
And music. Elvis didn’t make his first record for his mother (it was simply a demo). Lennon and McCartney never sat down and wrote a song together. MacArthur Park was about a park? I thought it was about a cake. Mike Jagger is considering suicide rather than being forced to sing “Satisfaction” again?
Then I found out Paul Anka wrote “My Way” which I always thought was Frank Sinatra’s “My Way” until Elvis recorded “My Way” his way and then a lot of other singers sang it their way, which was essentially the same way. I’m so confused.
I want to go back to when I wouldn’t have noticed the zipper on the back of The Creature From The Black Lagoon’s costume. When the bad guys would widen their eyes and cackle on the screen, followed by a full orchestra playing “Da-Da-Da-Dum!” When I was content learning “Rose Bud” was Citizen Kane’s sleigh, without a clue that in real life Orson Welles was mocking William Randolph Hearst’s pet name for his girlfriend’s genitalia (true).
Speaking of sex, take me back to Sophia Loren coming out of the water in ‘Boy on a Dolphin’. Back to Annette’s first bra, Barbara Eden’s hidden navel, and Diana Rigg as Emma Peel. Better yet, take me back to the days when I had no reason not to believe the phrase “You’re so big!”
Life goes on, but progress should be measured in perspective. Let’s take a break. No more Learning or Discovery Channel, block publication of Entertainment Weekly, and redirect all Google searches to AOL. That alone will take us back a decade.
Then, write your Congressperson. Restore the Fairness Doctrine and shut down Fox, YouTube, Facebook and Twitter. Return to the principle of “Ignorance is Bliss” and we’ll all be happy…again.
The time has arrived for me to head out to play. Enjoy and that is my two cents for today.